XXII. Own Your Insecurities
Live in the spiritual realm. Take yourself lightly.
“If anyone tells you that a certain person speaks ill of you, do not make excuses about what is said of you but answer, ‘He was ignorant of my other faults, else he would not have mentioned these alone’…” — Epictetus
It's not cool to speak ill of yourself.
Or criticize ourselves harshly when the benefit lies in being aware of our mistakes and getting better.
However, it's good to be real with who we are, the tendencies and peculiarities we have and where we're at in life.
It's wise to know our inadequacies without trying to hide them, belaboring them or using them as a chance to benefit from acting as a victim.
We'll also be prudent to know that those we admire, in social media and real life, only show us bits of themselves.
They're not as perfect as we've imagined them.
So what's with all the pressure we keep giving ourselves?
They're all flawed humans — just as we are.
Every single one of them.
How do we deal with insecurities?
When we expose our flaws they lose their power for we're already at peace with them. They're no longer a surprise.
It’s also good to remind ourselves that people don't care.
They only do if it affects them. Of which, the insecurities will soon cease to matter because we’re always getting better.
This gives us a chance to give people their credit where it's due and learn from those ahead of us without feeling lesser because their strength doesn't diminish our abilities, the quality of our work or who we are as people — that belongs to us.
We also defuse people who try to crush us using the thumbscrew of our insecurities or unwarranted criticism when we own them.
For example, someone tells you, while you're resting after a long day,